Repost: Do She Hear the Music

              Due to the recent controversy over my post on The Four Rules Concerning Arousal, I am reposting this essay to give you a better insight into a man who is just beginning his tango education. Enjoy!

              One of the most rewarding aspects of tango is when two people share the music they are dancing to. This may be difficult for some people to understand, so I would like to explain. Hearing the music and feeling the music are two different things, but together, they help us to share the rhythm and the melody of a song with a partner. To describe both would be an arduous task, so I will concentrate on what is passing through our ears and not what is moving through our bones.

               To begin, I must first expound upon what is going on inside the brain of a novice. I’ll use me as an example, but please remember, all men are not me and, I apologize ahead of time to those who may be offended by what I say. Here are my thoughts as I am dancing tango with a woman at a milonga, the lights are dim:

               "Begin with a back ocho, Perri, that is your strong point. Where the hell is the beat in this song? How come no one else is dancing, yet? Wait until they begin. Wait. Oh-oh, can’t wait, there go my feet, I better catch up to them. Great! She hates me already! I feel displeasure. This is like being married. Focus, Perri, keep it simple and it’ll be over soon. Stick to the simple rhythms, take her to the cross, cruzada, salida…whatever, tango-close. Try to remember to rock step, that is a great move. Try walking, that’s not working, go back to salida-cruzada-tango-close. Did I clip her toes? Whoa! Cleavage! Look down….at her feet. Don’t stare at her breasts. Oh-oh, Tinker’s starting to wake up. Go to sleep little buddy, c’mon, don’t do this to me now. Focus. Step back, salida-cruzada-tango-close. Tinker, stay! Think about the river, remember that time on the Moose River, jumping into the frigid river to swim out to a rock covered with ice? Remember the ice cream headache? Back ocho-back ocho-front ocho-front ocho-back ocho, hey, did she just do a boleo? Here comes the end, good boy, Tinker, stay put. What? That’s all? Phweww!!!Thank God!"

               I am sure I can’t imagine what it is like for a woman on her initial forays into tango, so I won’t try. I have noticed, however, that some ladies obviously ‘hear’ the music. Some tangueras hear the music but, whether they do or not, is hard to discern. Some women don’t hear the music at all and this is very apparent.

               As my ability improved, I had to learn how to wait for the followers who clearly heard the tune and were dancing to it and not just with me. This added a whole new dimension to tango for me. A man is not just fine-tuned to sense a woman’s displeasure, he is extremely sensitive to her pleasure, as well. When I would wait for women during a ‘pasada’, giving her time to embellish, I began noticing little smiles on their faces and I would become elated.

               When I encountered a lady hiding her auricular abilities, I tested her with simple maneuvers and patterns. A dance with these tangueras became like a game. Sometimes the game was fun and other times it was not.

               Finally, I come to zombie-land. This is not a bad place, despite the name. It just means there is no discernible brain activity but the body is still warm. I am a guy, so that is all it takes.....sometimes. Other times it can be hell. A few times it has been a wrestling match. If she is just beginning, this is understandable. If this is her seventh year, it is okay to excuse yourself after the first song but do not ask another lady to dance until the next tanda.

               After five years of immersion in this art, I have witnessed the education of many milongueros. I saw a few guys who were like me, a Frankenstein with dance shoes, overwhelmed by the bright lights and the sensuality of women. I’ve also been a partner to many tangueras in their first year of training. One thing I noticed in all those who succeeded, was their resolve. In time, resolve becomes passion, and with passion, comes success. With success, however, does not come happiness. You have merely acquired the tool used to search for your bliss. Whether or not you find it is in the hands of the gods, and may, ultimately, be the instrument of your demise. This is, after all, tango, and not just an ordinary dance.




Note: For an in-depth look into the mind of the Kayak Hombre, read his book, available on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/River-Tango-perri-iezzoni/dp/1453865527/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1369366756&sr=1-1&keywords=River+tango