Friday, January 6, 2012

The Ten Most Important Things to Remember About Tango Etiquette

 
            I am applying for a job in New Mexico where there is no tango. As I jogged today, I figured I’d have to start my own tango society and wondered what I would tell people who had no idea what this dance was all about. By the time I got done, I decided that, if I could get everybody to act civilized, then anything we attempted would be a success. Here is what I came up with. Feel free to add your own rules in the comments section and, hopefully, my students will be able to refer to my blog and become better dancers.

1.     It’s all about the woman: whatever you do, leaders, respect her and do your best to make her look good. If your best cannot make her look good, then, at least try not to embarrass her. Chances are, she’s spent a little more time getting ready than a run through the sprinkler, so you know she wants to look good. Make sure you smell good, too. If you're clean and smelling fine, you're halfway to a good time.

2.     Don’t forget the breath-fresheners; Sugarless Dentine Ice is a popular gum amongst milongueros I know. It is not impolite to offer a piece to your partner, in fact, it might be considered offensive not to offer.

3.     Follow the line of dance, even if no one else is. Don’t pass other couples unless they’ve stopped breathing.

4.      Leaders should take responsibility for any mistakes and/or collisions. I witnessed a great collision at Dance Manhattan. Man-B danced his lady into Man-A’s partner. Man-B, to my astonishment, demanded an apology from Man-A. Man-A was equally astonished but said it was no one’s fault. Man-B insisted his woman had been wronged and adamantly insisted on an apology. After several exchanges, Man-A offered a diplomatic statement acknowledging some guilt. They shook hands and continued dancing. Man-B was definitely being a jerk but his follower was elated. So was Man-A’s companion, I guess because her guy was obviously the more noble of the two men. Women are so sadistic! So, be a man and take it like a masochist;-) In the end, it’s all about Rule#1.

5.      Use cabeceo as often as possible. It is better to miss a chance to dance than it is to risk embarrassing your target.

6.      Don’t talk to your partner during the dance. This ruins the evening for a lot more people than just your companion.

7.      Sideline speech should be soft, polite and eloquent. We are often amongst strangers and we never know what level to engage others, so start at the top and work your way to the gutter later.

8.      Do not teach, offer advice or, in any other manner, try to instruct your partner. I know there are things your companion does that might be driving you crazy but keep it to yourself. I’ve been dancing with women for years who don’t do molinete when it is led, but, rather, they step forward, side and cross: every time! Every aspect of their technique is solid except for this one trait. I’ve been dealing with it for years and have yet to meet one of the offenders at a practica to see if it is me or them: so, I assume it is me and refer to Rule#1:-(

9.      Keep is simple, stupid: K.I.S.S. Practica is the place where you prepare for milonga. Do not attempt any moves at milonga that you have not perfected at practica! In the words of Master Yoda, “in milonga there is no try, only do, young padawan.”

10.   Finally, if you forget everything else, try to remember to RELAX! You are here to have fun and so is everyone else. Pour yourself another glass of wine and enjoy the music.

No comments:

Post a Comment